The other day as I was coming home from teaching seminary, I began to notice an awful squealing noise... At first I was hopeful that it was coming from on of the nearby farms and that it wasn't my car, but after I got off the gravel road, and turned onto the highway, there was no longer any doubt - it was me. I didn't go more than a 100 feet down the highway before turning around and high tailing it for the mechanics shop. As I drove the noise persisted. I couldn't help but wonder if our mechanic could hear me coming from his shop!
I was blessed in that when I arrived at the shop, the mechanic was able to take a look at my car. He diagnosed a rock in the tire, but could not find it in the usual place, meaning he had to take the tire off. I sat down to wait, hoping that he would indeed find a rock and not some other malady. About 10 minutes later he came in holding a very tiny piece of gravel - about half the size of my fingernail. I was amazed that such a tiny rock could be the culprit for so much noise! I was so thankful to have it gone! I guess a rock in a tire is kind of like having a rock in your shoe, until you get it out, it is hard to think of anything else!
I was blessed further in that my mechanic did not charge me for the work he did. That leaves it up to me to pay it forward.
Our plans for the day, were to drive to Cardston to attend the temple. As we traveled I worked on my next seminary lesson, but there was something about that little rock that left an impression on me. Sometimes, we get little rocks in our souls and we don't always treat them like we would if they were in our shoe. If we get a rock in our shoe, we usually stop, and dump it out. It is quickly forgotten and we move on steadily and confidently. However, a rock in the soul is often lodged so deeply and securely near our heart that we don't know how to get rid of it. It may be an injustice we have suffered, a shock, a betrayal, or even an act of abuse. By choosing to leave it there, wedged next to our heart, we are barely able to function and go about our daily responsibilities. Relationships suffer, individuals are pushed away or discarded, all in the name of the tiny squealing rock. It looks and feels like a boulder.
Rather than removing the rock, we begin to blame others for its presence in the first place and for the resultant noise it is making. Gossip starts, collusion begins, alliances are formed, and before we know it our heart is in a state of war as it listens to the insistent screams of the rock which is now so firmly wedged, that the thought of removal is promises pain. As odd as it may sound, if it were removed, all the excuses and justifications would have to go with it. Faced with that, the rock has become a safety net - painful though it may be, it is clung to as though it were part of our original composition. We begin to lie to ourselves just so that we can hang onto all we have built up around it... We think about it everyday. If we were let it go what would we focus on? How would we continue to justify everything we have done thus far to explain our need for that squealing rock?
And yet, the rock is still a foreign object. It doesn't belong where it is. And if we really honestly asked ourselves about it's presence, we would quite quickly wish it away. But we have put to much work into explaining its presence that to have it removed is scary. Someone we value might label us bad or not want to associate with us anymore. Is it worth getting rid of? And how do you get rid of a rock that is wedged so tightly near your heart even though you hate the noise of it in your life?
Just like I did not know how to fix my car, there is only one way to get rid of a rock that is wedged near our hearts. We must go to the Master Mechanic. Only through His redeeming love can it be removed. It is also up to us to help him. We do this by desiring to have it gone from our lives, and then letting it go. When the mechanic showed me the rock I was amazed by it smallness because it seemed like something making that much noise should have been a LOT bigger! I had no desire to keep it. It was quickly discarded in the garbage and forgotten. When we give our rocks to the Savior, we should do so so completely that we would never consider asking for them back, or wishing that we had them. However, if we were to look at them, we would be shocked at just how small they really are!
The great beauty in all this, is that the Master Mechanic does not require a fee for His services just like my mechanic did not require a fee of me. Instead, all He asks of us is to do good to others, to be a blessing in the lives of all we know rather than a curse. As we do this, He lifts our burdens from us and we become free to feel happy again. Free to let the bonds of justification and blame drop away. The happiness that comes is so tangible and liberating that it is worth giving away EVERY sin to possess it! What joy fills my heart as I ponder the great love that my Savior, Jesus Christ has for me. He has removed many rocks from my soul, and I have been blessed to know of the happiness that is promised. He is the surest, fastest way to JOY that we have and others see it in us. Later that day as I was leaving the temple, I had a lady approach me and tell me how happy I looked. I WAS happy. I still am HAPPY. My happiness has come through letting little rocks be removed from my soul through Christ.
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