So I am going to try to once again to visit this space of joy often. Life has been good since my last post. I have been richly, richly blessed by the hand of the Lord in my life. Not everything in my life is ideal. There are deep sorrows and losses that I mourn over daily, but I have been blessed through it all, or maybe in spite of it all. I enjoy a level of happiness one might not expect in such circumstances. Of course, I’m not happy over those losses and challenges, but there are so many joys in between, and around them that I would be ungrateful if I chose to be miserable and unhappy.
First of all, there are my children. They’ve all grown and left home now, and for the most part, they are doing well! We have been able to help with projects, babysit, enjoy family gatherings, and get together‘s. We’ve celebrated birthdays, graduations, weddings, and more. Just this year we have welcomed two more wonderful grandchildren. It brings such joy to my heart to hear those little voices say Grandma or Grandpa. We have amazing telephone conversations with our two-year-old granddaughters. One speaks very well and tells us all about her day and the other is still learning, but carries is on a full-blown conversation in her own dialect, complete with inflection and complete confidence in what she is saying. I love snuggling the babies and playing with the older children. I love visiting with my grown children and hearing about their struggles and their triumphs. I love to see the projects that they are involved in and hear about their days. Yes, I even love helping with homework when needed. I think it is safe to say that we support each other to the best of our ability and I’m so grateful that we can give one another the grace to make mistakes but still love deeply.
Secondly, I am so grateful for the Church of Jesus, Christ of latter day, Saints. I have had opportunity to serve in different capacities within this wonderful organization where we are striving to be better, practicing living like Jesus, of loving him more and trying to follow him. I have met people that I would not have met without those interactions. One calling that I absolutely love is serving in the temple twice a month. I love the temple. It has an atmosphere of complete and absolute love and acceptance. I learn so much about what it feels like to love like Christ when I am there. And I get to practice as I help others learn and experience that wonderful spirit of love. I love that the temple invites me to get to know my family better. It always drives me back to researching family history, recording life stories, cataloging photographs, and sharing memories. It feels so good to build that familiarity with my blood relations even though they may be long since gone. Another calling, that I am very involved in is working in the Relief Society within our ward. I love teaching the gospel, and I love listening to the prophets. In Relief Society, we get to teach the words of our prophet and ponder how his counsel can draw us closer to our Savior, Jesus Christ. President Nelson encourages us to emulate the example of Christ and has invited us to be peacemakers, to have greater Charity, and to end the conflict in our hearts. I get to teach these messages on the Sabbath, I get to lead discussions on strengthening families once a month and I get to participate every week in a study group where we consider the words of our prophets and how they apply to our lives right now. I get to work with some of the choicest women on the earth whose hearts are golden. I love them so much and I am so thankful for their friendship and love.
Third, I am so grateful for technology. I have discovered some podcasts which I listen to while I work cleaning early in the mornings and some of the people on those podcasts have begun to feel like friends. And they have taught me the gospel and helped me draw closer to my Savior, Jesus Christ on a more personal level. They have inspired me, no matter what I am feeling – especially when I am struggling, I know I can talk to Jesus about it and he will listen. Technology also helps me study the gospel, set goals, and improve myself. I am blessed to own a device that allows me to write notes, illustrate, and plan my time and it not only keeps me organized, but focused on the things that matter most.
I could go on. I am grateful for so many other things. Over this last year and a half we have been blessed with health, work, increased testimony and faith, with peace, joy, and happiness. We have been blessed with new friends as well as the connection with old friends. We have been blessed to further improve our property, to produce our own food, and to have enough and to spare. We have been led by people who teach us new skills. One example being over the last year we have been learning how conflict can actually be a blessing in life. I can share more on that in another post, but I have always feared conflict and avoided it. It is liberating to understand that it can actually be a catalyst for greater connection in relationships. Who knew?!!!
Laced through it all are the challenges which are most certainly present. There is a host of them… uncertainty, loss, lack of time, fatigue, pain… feeling withdrawl of others, feeling judged or criticized, feeling threatened, struggles with worth and value, staying motivated, staying awake, juggling schedules, meeting commitments, expectations, ageing parents and even our own aging bodies. But I want you to know that Jesus has been in it with us and because he is there we rise above these things… Not all at once, but because he is there, we trust him to guide us through each challenge. And he does for some of them, and for others, he strengthens us to hold on a little longer, and trust his timing and knowledge. Waiting is probably the hardest road to walk especially when you’re waiting for a desired blessing, but I know that even through the wait, joy can be found for I have found it.
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